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Day 695: I Waited Nine Years For Harry Potter To …?

MAJOR HARRY POTTER 7 SPOILERS AHEAD.  READ AHEAD AT YOUR OWN PERIL. 

*** SPOILER WARNING *** SPOILER WARNING ***

As I was saying, I waited nine years and stayed up until 1:30AM today for Potter to live … and marry Ginny?  *sigh*

Did Scholastic threaten to withhold profits if Rowling wrote a sad, yet more reasonable, ending to the Harry Potter series?  Granted, the last 100 pages of each of her books thus far have required a deep suspension of even magical logic, but if the resurrection of Harry Potter after the removal of the Voldemort-ridden portion of his soul is not a Deus ex machina, I don’t know what is.  And, wasn’t it convenient that the Potter-defeated Draco was the previous master of the Elder Wand, so suck it, Voldemort?  Too bad there won’t be a Book 8 which spends the first half explaining the end of its precursor.  While we’re at it, can I also get a WTF to the epilogue?

On the bright side, the book confirmed three of my suspicions:

– Harry was the seventh horcrux (duh!)
– Snape was a good guy all along
– Ron and Hermione live

I admit to having suffered great grief at Dobby’s and Snape’s deaths.  Dobby was simply the cleanest soul in Potter-world.  Being prepared for the half-blooded prince’s eventual passing did not prepare me for the circumstances, and that his Patronus was a doe about sent me over the edge into two-kleenex territory.  Makes me teary-eyed just thinking about his soft side, something kept alive by love and loyalty, however unrequited.  I’ve always harbored empathy and understanding for the non-chirpy, iconoclastic and thus misunderstood soul (and Alan Rickman).

Let me reiterate my disappointment in the epilogue, written to placate six-year-olds who can’t bear to watch their favorite fictional friends die.  Beyond that, it makes the heroes sound like they turned into boring adults, with traditional husband and wife roles.  Just like Bill The Cat, they should have simply ridden off into the sunset.

More after discussions with Mrs. Humid City this evening.

6 comments… add one
  • jeffrey July 25, 2007, 3:41 PM

    Ohhhh that epilogue. Jesus Horse Balls Christ! So they’ve all got little wizzard brats who gives a crap.. what happened to them after school? What are their careers? Who is head of Hogwarts? Who is Minister of Magic?

    I also don’t understand why Harry gets to come back from the dead because Voldemort shares his blood.. but that doesn’t work in reverse.

    Also… well.. also all kind of crap. I posted my other complaints in the usual yellow fashion.

  • Bob Plankers July 25, 2007, 6:55 PM

    I am also not happy with HP7. It feels like the third Star Wars movie, where they had to quick tie up a ton of loose ends, and did a crappy job of it.

    That whole “Deathly Hallows” thing was a bunch of BS. How did Dumbledore end up there, exactly? Why is it people only explain things to Harry after someone dies (in this case, him)? Why is it nobody else in the wizarding world has ever heard of these things, the Deathly Hallows, the Elder Wand, etc. etc. etc. Wizards must be some seriously dumb mofos and have zero interest in their own history to miss this stuff.

    I was hoping Voldemort would run off with Neville or something, and the world would be at peace.

    At least there is some closure to the series, and it isn’t left open for run-on sequels.

  • Blair July 25, 2007, 7:37 PM

    JKR is reportedly planning an encyclopedia to flesh out characters, answer questions and make more money.

  • Maitri July 26, 2007, 11:36 AM

    Voldemort would run off with Neville or something

    Ahahahahaaaaa!!! Plankers, you’re brilliant! Voldemort always seems like a Terrible, End Of The World. Doom And Dread spook, until Harry physically runs into him and he comes off as some cheesy Arabian Nights villain.

    I was ready for Harry to die, trepidation and love filled my heart as he headed towards Voldemort (with his dead parents and friends) ready to sacrifice himself. That end would have been so much more profound. Not Neville becoming the freakin’ Herbology professor 19 years later.

  • tamasha July 28, 2007, 5:31 PM

    Sigh. I know. I just finished it. My students are going to be disappointed with the “and all was well” too.

    I also love Snape (and Alan Rickman who I saw last year in NYC! I was too scared to talk to him though) and cried when he died, and then cried more when Harry was looking through the Pensieve (brilliant word for it, though).

  • tamasha July 31, 2007, 3:33 PM

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