Riding the crest of joy that comes with Packers beat Vikings, I almost forgot about this matchup which Dave awaits with much rancor:
The stars are right for an epic matchup, The Biggest College Football Game in the History of Ever, wherein the Michigan Wolverines head into the cyclopean, non-Euclidean nexus of evil to take on the many-tentacled Buckeye monster.
… This is their charge. This is their destiny. Much is at stake. Should they fail in their quest, the world will succumb to trailer parks, Bud Light, wife-beater t-shirts, monosyllabic words, and all other things Ohio.
Non-Euclidean is an interesting term for a state which contains a city with a very large thoroughfare named Euclid. Forget Dave’s words and, instead, concentrate on the cuteness of his Buckeye-thulhu:
Aaaaawwwww, he’s so adorable, he reminds me of Hello Cthulhu.
Hey hey…it was great to see the Packers beat the Vikes AT Minnesota. Maybe (all fingers and toes crossed) they’ll finish strong.
I’m of the opinion that Wolverines are like Creoles, they don’t really exist.
However, I’ll be rooting for them, as always, to beat the Suckeyes.
While I despise both the non-existent Wolverines and the Suckeyes, I have to root for the Ohio brand of evil. Why? My parents, brother, extended family and close friend live in Ohio.
And because I’ve always had fun in Ohio and never in Michigan. Nothing good ever came out of Michigan but some Kalamazoo beer products. And I like to piss off my friend, Brett, who went to school in Michigan and makes fun of the Badgers.
You’re just still bitter Michigan whupped the Badgers, which game I happily attended.
As for “non-Euclidean,” that’s the adjective Lovecraft always trotted out when describing the alien architecture of his fictional monster cities.
Oh great, now I sound like a dork.