DOingMESTIC

Interesting experiment of the day: Spray 3M super-industrial adhesive on shoe to force adhesion of sole to sandal. Wait and see if heel is permanently affixed to said sandal instead. Wouldn’t that be funny?

A reverberatingly exciting weekend was had vacuuming floors, cleaning bathrooms, touching up paint, doing dishes, and putting in a new dining set, while D raked and cleared the yard. The fanfare only continues tonight with the scrubbing of the kitchen floor and wiping of refrigerator shelves.

My immediate family (set comes with two children) will be here on Thursday. Hence, the previously-mentioned bout of cleaning. To the point where I am now in dire need of more sleep, yet want to go back home and clean some more. Unfinished business is one of my pet peeves; works disasters on my obsessive-compulsive nature.

(Great, now I have adhesive all over my fingers and my right index finger threatens not to unattach itself from letter N, or the left mouse button, for that matter.)

Work is treating me much better this week, mostly by hibernating and not rearing its ugly hairdo. Things will work out for me, as they always do. Learning and keeping on is key. As long as I am educating myself and not stagnating, and earning that helpful paycheck, things can’t be all that bad. Right? RIGHT?

Venezuela – What’s Not Reported in the News

From Venezuelan friends who are incensed at the results of their last referendum. It is interesting to note that a lot more people made the recount possible than finally voted against Chavez. This is not the first source through which I have heard of possible electronic vote tampering. Also not surprising considering the 10 hour wait in line to vote and threats made on civilian lives by local officials.

We’re gentler here, we just get the Supreme Court to fix it for us.


To share with your friends around the world. Detailed information provided by U.S. observers regarding Venezuelan Referendum…

It is a “short” summary of what happenned. Unfortunately the opposition trusted too much Mr. Carter and the Organization of American States (OEA) among many factors. The report only misses the billions of OIL dollars that were thrown in social “missions” without any control, as part of greatest corruption and power abuse, ever, in Venezuela.

Sincere regards,
Humberto

***
Venezuela – What’s Not Reported in the News

Senator Bill Nelson Congressman Robert Wexler
Care of Pete Contostavolos Care of Eva Cargi
716 Hart Senate Office Building 213 Cannon House Office Building
Washington, D. C. 20510-0905 Washington, D. C. 20515-0919
Phone: : (202) 224-5274 Phone: (202) 225-3001
Fax: (202) 228-2183 Fax: (202) 225-5974

Subject: Venezuelan Presidential Recall Referendum, as seen by US International Observers Curtis Reed and Steve Henley

Dear Senator Nelson and Congressman Wexler:

As you know, Steve Henley (Democratic candidate for Supervisor of Elections, Hillsborough) and I were in Venezuela as international observers with the invitation of the Democratic Coordinator. During the RRP, we traveled around to between 18 and 25 voting centers, so many we lost count. We saw a great many irregularities in the processes, actions that here in the United States would immediately be called a fraud.

As you read the list below, please ask yourselves the following question:

If, during the November 2004 election in the United States, we were witness to similar behaviors perpetrated by the currentadministration against the Democratic opposition, would we or wouldwe not decry that the government had committed a massive fraud?

* In the days leading up to the election, President Chavez had warned that with the Finger Print machines and the Smartmatic machines, he would know who voted against him. This was threat to the opposition, intended to intimidate the opposition. Remember that during the Referendum signature drive, voters were government employees and who signed against the government were fired en masse.

* The CNE’s Junta Nacional Electoral President Jorge Rodriguez made comments to the public about the norms and processes while flanked by military Generals, another tactic apparently designed to intimidate the
opposition by demonstrating that he had been given control of the military.

* The government ordered the police to remain in their barracks, leaving the people unprotected. In the opposition areas, the Chavistas operated with impunity, riding around threatening the people with arms,
and in some cases firing on them. Meanwhile, in the “popular” sectors of town, the police were out of their barracks, apparently to help the government control the vote.

* We were threatened on several occasions, at least once with pistols concealed under the shirts of Chavistas who yelled threats and showed us their weapons.

* When we went into the 23 de Enero barrio, Chavistas working in the voting area turned into rabble-rousers and tried to stir the crowd into attacking us. The Plan República troops did nothing to stop them, and when our safety was in question, they escorted us out. We could no longer observe the many irregularities in the area.

* We videotaped the damages to the home of the Primero Justicia coordinator, whose house was machine-gunned at around 3:00 AM of the morning of the Referendum. We witnessed that the government summarily
fired thousands of poll workers previously accredited by the CNE, simply because they had signed the referendum against the president. In their place, the CNE actively hired pro-government workers that they
called directly (in violation of the CNE’s own election norms that stated that they had to be selected by “sorteo”, or random drawing), and they brought in workers from other districts to work in the mostly
opposition areas, and other clear violation of the norms.

* We saw that the Comando Maisanta had obtained illegal “Security” badges and had illegally set up cordons and were blocking the entrance to the voting centers to members of the opposition (in the mostly Chavista centers, such as Catia).

* We received first hand reports from witnesses who saw armed Comando Maisanta and Circulos Bolivarianos posted outside voting centers, threatening the people who tried to vote SI.* We witnessed military officers prohibiting the vote of people in the opposition areas because they were “wearing shorts”, a violation of the constitution and their human rights.

* Thousands of voters who voted SI, were physically assaulted at the voting centers.

* We were informed by an elderly woman that when she asked forassistance voting in a mostly Chavista area, a CNE voting officer asked her: “You need help voting?” then pushed the NO button for her and said: “There.”

* Armed officialist “terrorists” of the Bolivarian Circles led by Lina Ron invaded a voting center in Avenida Urdaneta, of the Libertador unicipality in Caracas, and only allowed government supporters to vote. These terrorists fired their guns at the opposition that tried to vote.

* We saw that the military controlled the flow of people into the voting areas and slowed down the progress until we arrived. Witnesses heard them radio to their comrades that “International Observers have arrived. Speed up the flow.” They then gave orders to change the flow of voters from 5 or so every 10 minutes, to groups of 30.

* Voting centers (in opposition areas) that normally had up to 9 tables were reduced to only 3 tables.

* The CNE dictated norms detailing the anticipated behavior of CNE employees in general and in certain possible contingencies, such as machine malfunction (by both the Smartmatic SAES machines and the
Finger Print machines).

* CNE workers refused to follow the CNE changes to the norms to either stop using the Finger Print machines when they malfunctioned, or, when it was determined that the machines were becoming a bottle-neck to the process, the CNE ordered that they be used as a final process or stopped, but the CNE employees adept to the
government refused to obey the orders.

* Sixty CNE workers who were required to run the Finger Print Hunting machines (Caza Huellas) failed to report to duty on time, inviolation of the CNE norms. This caused great delays in the voting process.

* Other CNE workers refused to open the voting centers on time, causing delays of up to three or four hours.

* CNE workers friendly to the government closed the polls at the wrong times, ignoring the Norms created by the CNE.

* Many voters who provided their fingerprints were told that they had already voted and could not vote. Some of these voters were arrested.

* A Chavista table witness told us that she had personally told an elderly woman (in her seventies) whose fingerprint was rejected that she could not vote because she had already voted and accused her of trying to commit fraud. When we asked her if she knew that the machines had a margin of error and that the poor woman might have been wrongly accused of fraud, she told us she had not been told of that.

* We used stopwatches to time the flow of voters. In predominantly Chavista areas, we saw that the flow was rapid (roughly 1.5 to 2 minutes per voter). In areas that were predominantly opposition, the voting rate was much slower (between 5 and 10 minutes per voter).

* International Observers were blocked from entering some voting centers.

* In some voting centers, the review process was started without the presence of Opposition witnesses to guarantee transparency.

* Opposition witnesses and table members were physically removed fromvoting centers or blocked from entering and guaranteeing transparency.

* In the months leading up to the Referendum, hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of foreigners were given citizenship and immediate voting rights in massive ceremonies that literally filled stadiums, in violation of the immigration laws. These expeditiously nationalized people were allowed to vote in the referendum.

* In the days leading up to the vote, the CNE workers migrated voters out of their home districts and into districts many miles from their residences, sometimes into other countries. A pattern was discovered indicating that many voters were migrated from mostly Opposition areas into areas filled with government supporters. These areas are lawless and extremely dangerous, and many voters chose not to vote rather than
risk their lives.

* When pro-government voters did not appear on the voting lists, in many cases they were immediately provided with a solution at that center and allowed to vote. Contrarily, opposition voters who were not
on the lists were told they simply could not vote.

* Pro-government representatives paid money to voters who indicated that they had voted NO.

* We received denunciations that the military members who wanted to vote had to do so with their superior officers watching their selection.

* After the tabulation of the votes, citizens from many centers are reporting that the Voter Verifiable Paper Trail tickets printed by the machines have been found dumped in the streets.

* The CNE workers in charge of safeguarding the materials failed to complete their duties after the end of the referendum, since reports have flooded in that indicate that the Voter Verifiable Paper tickets were found dumped in the streets of some barrios.

* The CNE repeatedly issued statements that contradicted the Venezuelan Bolivarian Constitution, limiting the rights of suffrage in unconstitutional ways. Regarding the suffrage rights of citizens living abroad, for example, the CNE said that only citizens living with permanent residence in those countries could vote, and that people with extended tourist visas could not vote. Only in the last days before the referendum, when it was too late for citizens living abroad to register to vote, did the CNE change its position and state that they determined
that the Constitution allowed for citizens on Tourist Visas to vote. However, they still denied the right of suffrage to Venezuelan citizens living abroad whose residency status was out of date, which still
remains hotly contested as a constitutional violation.

Despite these attempts to limit the access to vote, the voters remained in line heroically. They organized support teams bringing food, water, chairs, umbrellas/parasols, music, board games, radios, and everything
else you can imagine to keep people’s spirits up. Some waited in line to vote for up to 14 hours, and absolutely refused to leave.

When I asked the people if they would get tired and leave, the answer was ALWAYS the same: “I will die in this line before I leave!” For those who were shot while waiting in line, this statement of determination became a prediction of their real fate. These people have become martyrs for democracy, and we should not abandon them.

DEFINITIONS OF FRAUD:

As a general standard by which to examine the activities and determine
if they can be considered Fraudulent, the Florida Department of State
defines Voter Fraud as “Sintentional misrepresentation, trickery,
deceit, or deception, arising out of or in connection with voter
registration or voting”. (For more information, follow this link:
Florida Definition of Voter Fraud). According to these standards (which
by their nature of being US laws are not applicable to Venezuela but at
least give us a standard by which to examine the activities), we can
come to an initial conclusion that the behaviors would, at least in the
United States, be considered fraudulent behavior.

Article 216, number 2 of the Venezuelan Organic law of Suffrage and
Political Participation states that the election shall be nullified;
“Whenever there has occurred fraud, coercion, bribery or violence in
the formation of the Registro Electoral, in the elections or in the
examination of results and said vices affect the result of the election
involved.” This law consecrates the nullification of the election for
vices produced in various aspects of the electoral exercise such as the
formation of the electoral registry, the voting procedures and scrutiny
of results.

Venezuelan jurisprudence established precedence for the nullification
of election results in the Organic Law of Suffrage (1993) when it can
be demonstrated that the vices in the electoral exercise have a direct
affect on the end result of the election, that being the total
result of the election after examining the final vote count.

The Venezuelan Opposition legal teams will have to work to determine if
the fraud currently evidenced by the many irregularities meets
these standards, but a quick examination of the election results
suggest that there was indeed fraud as determined by Venezuelan organic
law.

EXIT POLL RESULTS

Exit polls from across the country clearly gave the opposition the
victory. At the time of completion of the voting, SUMATE and Penn,
Schoen & Berland Associates, tabulated the results of their exit polls.
The results were consistent:

* Penn, Schoen & Berland Associates Exit poll: 59% a favor del SI; 41% a favor del NO
http://www.psbsurveys.com/home/index2.htm

*

SUMATE Exit poll: 59.4% a favor del SI; 40.6% a favor del NO
http://www.sumate.org

A breakdown by State indicates how widespread the victory appeared to
have been:

STATE YES Vote % NO Vote %
Dto Capital SI 61% NO 39%
Anzoátegui: SI 61% NO 39%
Apure: SI 62% NO 38%
Aragua: SI 60% NO 40%
Barinas SI 52% NO 48%
Bolivar SI 62% NO 38%
Carabobo SI 65% NO 35%
Falcón SI 48% NO 52%
Guárico SI 52% NO 48%
Lara SI 55% NO 48%
Mérida SI 52% NO 48%
Miranda SI 79% NO 21%
Monagas SI 60% NO 40%
Nva. Esparta SI 80% NO 20%
Portuguesa SI 65% NO 35%
Sucre SI 57% NO 43%
Táchira SI 74% NO 46%
Trujillo SI 54% NO 46%
Yaracuy SI 59% NO 41%
Vargas SI 33% NO 67%
Zulia SI 62% NO 38%

Note that, if these exit polls are correct, the Chavez government only
won two of the twenty one states (Vargas and Falcon). Adjusting
to reasonable statistical error of 3%, the government might have won
Barinas, Guarico, Merida, and Lara.

Poll results from voters outside Venezuela are also very telling:
Voting Center SI % NO % Null Total
New York 881 92.7 67 7.3 2 950
San Francisco 479 95.2 19 4.8 5 503
Boston 436 94.8 18 5.2 6 460
Chicago 529 94.6 24 5.4 6 559
Houston 1.570 95.9 63 4.1 3 1,636
Germany 307 78.9 81 20.8 1 389
France 232 78.6 63 21.4 N/A 295
Italy 343 94.6 33 5.4 N/A 376
Australia 94 93 6 7 1 170
Chec Republic 13 68.4 6 31.6 N/A 19
Mexico 602 95.5 23 4.5 5 630

It can be inferred from this that the poll results across the country
clearly indicated that the trend across Venezuela was for a landslide
victory for the Recall. Unfortunately, something happened that rendered
those poll results moot.

WAS THE SMARTMATIC MACHINE USED TO COMMIT FRAUD?

Analysis of the Acts is providing evidence that the Smartmatic voting
machines may have manipulated the results, and we are naturally very
concerned. This is exactly the worse case scenario about which we
warned you in June.

SUMATE has identified a number of areas where the voting results
indicate that a “cap” was placed on the total possible SI votes. In a
number of tables and voting centers, the voting results are absolutely
identical. That is to say, the number of people voting for
the SI option stopped at a specific number (say, 1,500 SI votes) in
multiple voting centers, and in some cases, both the number of SI
votes and the number of NO votes are identical between multiple voting
centers.

MUNICIPALITY No. C. V. VOTING CENTER NAME TABLE MACH. No. ACTA NO SI
BERMUDEZ 45170 U. E. MARIA DE VERA 1 1 1.1-1000-4 324 180
BERMUDEZ 45170 U. E. MARIA DE VERA 1 2 2.1-1000-3 306 180

BERMUDEZ 45190 C. B. JOSE FCO. BERMUDEZ 2 1 2.1-1000-1 355 112
BERMUDEZ 45190 C. B. JOSE FCO. BERMUDEZ 2 3 2.3-1000-7 364 112

VALDEZ 47860 G. E. ALEJANDRO VILLANUEVA 1 1 1.1-1000-8 285 138
VALDEZ 47860 G. E. ALEJANDRO VILLANUEVA 1 3 1.3-1000-4 267 138

VALDEZ 47870 G. E. GUIRIA 1 1 1.1-1000-7 249 132
VALDEZ 47870 G. E. GUIRIA 1 3 1.3-1000-3 235 132

ARISMENDI 44290 U. E. ROJAS PAUL 1 1 1-1-1000-1 273 147
ARISMENDI 44290 U. E. ROJAS PAUL 1 3 1-3-1000-7 266 147

ARISMENDI 44300 U. E. NICOLAS FLORES 1 1 1-2-1000-6 254 145
ARISMENDI 44300 U. E. NICOLAS FLORES 1 2 1-1-1000-8 276 145

Reports are also being presented to the effect that in many centers the
“cap” was on the percentage rather than on the number of votes. We are
waiting to receive more information on these allegations to corroborate
them.

These are just a few of the highly suspicious results that are being
reported. We have chosen to await more details before
drawingconclusions about the Smartmatic system’s performance. It is
absolutely crucial now that all of the paper ballots and the machines
be sequestered, although it may very well be too late, as the
government has probably prepared for this situation and has covered its
tracks.

CONCLUSIONS

After personally witnessing the process, our organization has decided
to divide the analysis into two separate areas and provide separate
conclusions on each.

Electoral Processes and Procedures: We are able to confidently state,
without fear of unfair bias, following close study of the CNE’s voting
norms and the Venezuelan Bolivarian Constitution, that the Venezuelan
government, military services (Plan República) and itsclosely allied
civil organizations (Comando Maisanta and Circulos Bolivarianos), did
regularly and knowingly violate the Constitutional
Protections, Electoral Norms, and Human Rights of the Venezuelan
opposition electorate in a manner that is consistent with an attempt to
change the election results. It is difficult at this juncture to tell
if these tactics had any effect on the election, since the voters were
so determined to withstand the intimidation, long delays and other
tactics employed to try to disenfranchise them.

We, the Directors of Free Venezuela, denounce the fraud (or attempted
fraud) committed by the Venezuelan government and its supporters in the
military and civilian organizations.

Electronic Vote ManipulationThere are a number of other irregularities
in the results that indicate that the machines were used to manipulate
the election results, and that this manipulation of results would have
been sufficient to change the end results of the election.

If the Venezuelan opposition is able to demonstrate this, and if we
find that the machines were indeed used to commit a fraud, we shall
immediately request an investigation in the United States Congress and
Senate of the Smartmatic Company and, as we have indicated
previously, will propose application of the Foreign Corrupt Practices
Act to the company’s officers.

WHAT CAN YOU DO FOR VENEZUELA AND DEMOCRACY?

Senator Bill Nelson and Congressman Wexler, the Venezuelan democratic
crisis has finally reached the boiling point, and if our suspicions are
correct, we may now be witnessing the “worst case scenario” about
electronic voting fraud. This situation is worrisome not just for
Venezuela, but also for democracy everywhere.

We know for a fact that Smartmatic is trying to obtain certification in the United States, and eventually hopes to sell their SAES machines
here.

We respectfully request that you use your influence to initiate an
investigation, and to pressure Smartmatic to explain in detail all of
the discrepancies. We would like to request that Doctor Rebecca Mercuri
and Doctor Avi Rubin become involved in the case, as we believe they
are the foremost experts in this subject and will be able to shed light
on the case.

Additionally, I would like to speak directly with the Senator and
Congressman to explain what we saw. We would be willing to travel to
Washington D.C. or your local offices to do so. Top-level members of
the Democratic Coordinator and SUMATE would be willing to join us. This
issue is of utmost importance. Please grant me this meeting request.

Thank you

Oppression?: American Poverty and Sharia Law In Canada

On this morning’s Reuters report:

Some 1.3 million Americans slid into poverty in 2003 despite the economic recovery, and children and blacks were worse off than most, the government said on Thursday in a report certain to fuel Democratic criticism of President Bush.

The percentage of the U.S. population living in poverty rose to 12.5 percent from 12.1 percent in 2002, the Census Bureau said in its annual poverty report, seen by some as the most important score card on the nation’s economy and Bush’s first term in office. The ranks of the poor rose to 35.9 million, a boost of 1.3 million.

Health care coverage also dropped last year and incomes were essentially stagnant, the Census Bureau said in its annual poverty report, seen by some as the most important score card on the nation’s economy and Bush’s first term in office.

What?! America doesn’t have poor people. The poor live in Iraq, which is why we’re there helping them find their natural resource. If there are 12.25%* poor in this country, it’s because the terrorists made them that way, because they hate America and the way we live with all of our freedoms and riches here.

*based on 2004 Population Reference Bureau number of 294 million

In other news, Canada’s legislative body is set to determine whether Islamic Sharia Law may be permitted to settle disputes within the growing Islamic community there.

[BBC News Article]

On the one hand, I believe that people should be allowed to practise their religions liberally, as long as their “worship” doesn’t negatively affect others. On the other, Sharia law is only one aspect of Islam that passes for writ, and any code that degrades humans, be it religious or secular, should not be tolerated. I wish theocratic Muslims would see the undemocracy of their ways and rectify the situation themselves, but that’s up to them, we can’t do anything about it. Or, can we?

To take the argument one step further, a similar analogy would be the KKK. I heartily disagree with their views and don’t think they should exist, but I appreciate their right to be. In that light, what about black Americans who live in fear of bigoted violence perpetrated by members of the KKK? Again, Irani women fled their nation to enjoy freedom in Canada. If their differences are now forced to be settled in Islamic court, how has western freedom and democracy served these women? In my opinion, the footprint of “religious freedom” is growing out of control. What about the rights of people to be free from the ramifications of religion?

Should a theocracy be able to exist within the context and rules of a democracy?

The Thousand Natural Shocks That Flesh Is Heir To

To my dear friend on the recent suicide death of his mother:

At this moment, I wish in earnest that I can be with you, to hold and infuse you with all of the most positive sentiments I can muster. Yet, through all, I want you to feel this pain. It is our ability to let the pain almost kill us that helps us experience the complement in happiness. So, feel away, I would be disappointed if your heart didn’t almost stop beating in sadness. There will come a time when your own soul will guide you back to a gentler day in which all doesn’t seem so dark. I know it is in you, so I do not worry. Know this, however – I am not there, but I am.

So strange the human tendency to want to experience life to the fullest and equally to desire not to be a part of it at all. With the latter, I refer to moments of irritated misanthropy as well as the extreme of ending your own life due to instability on all fronts.

While I lack the abject self-loathing and resultant psychosomatic illness(es) to put an end to my existence, I can understand how “socially productive” and seemingly satisfied living can be such an alien thing to some human beings. We are most curious creatures, dear friend, and our varying relationships with the world around us, along with the people in it, can never be encapsulated in mere words or experienced to the fullest in our current capacity as these organic machines. How cruel it is to give a human the desire to fly and not offer him wings. How ironic it is for us to be capable of dreaming and yearning for meaning in people and circumstances, yet presented only a dwindling pool of options to pick from. Even if most of it is garbage, do we not deserve a better quality of it?

Hamlet said it best. Not at the beginning of his famous soliloquy which almost every self-pitying fool seems to revel in, but in the last part:

But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscover’d country from whose bourn
No traveller returns, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pith and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action.

Thus conscience does make cowards of us all. Yes, who knows what greater slings and arrows await us in the land we journey to after this life? Again, speaking of cowardice, would the justice that pervades life and death be kind to us for stupidly taking on a new task while not being brave enough to face the challenges tangibly before us? So ready to squander our lives we are, to death and to religion, in the hopes of something better on the other side, in the new land, but little are we aware that we are yet to attain the fruits of our toil on this side of the void. Simply put, I have too much to do within this incarnation. Call it my karmically-inclined Hindu side talking, but this is why I hang on to life, live away at it and bear those ills that Hamlet speaks of – it is my unfinished business. Besides, I believe that somewhere on this earth, in the white noise, lies more than a glimmer of clarity and true happiness. I had hoped the paths and patterns leading to it would be clearer; hence, my chagrin.

If you’ve reached this point, know that there is sense in my babble, for better or for worse, and I hope you discover it. Maybe you have already. Take your time to reach back, all the time you need. I will be here when the time comes.


No, I am not surprised you used that line of Hamlet’s in your eulogy. I have a feeling I was channeling your mother’s suicide starting Thursday or so when I began to have very strange thoughts on the dual/singular nature of life and death.

So much to convey to you, so limited in methods of expression.

Words. Hamlet, you, me – we are so good at them, aren’t we? Yours and the Dane prince’s chosen and arranged in a more polished manner than mine, but words all the same. Why do we excel at that which limits us in true communication at the emotional level? What stops us humans from probing the mysteries of reaching one another through the loquaciousness of our energies alone?

[ snip]

Suicide is a very tragic and controversial way to go, as well as a large embarrassment for your family. The pain is over, though, and a different pain has set in. All realities you have to face. Thankfully, you don’t have to do it alone.

Words. Bleh. Wish I could be with you right now so you can see my face, which conveys a hell of a lot more than what I am typing right now.

High Fidelity

Thank heaven for music. Wherever you are and in whatever mood, you are guaranteed a tune that empathizes with your current state. Music will listen to you, help you think, amplify your thoughts, or even distract you completely. For that industry-recommended 3.5 minutes, you have experienced a perfect soundtrack for the current chapter of life.

Only recently having been at the shores of the Pacific, I walked around with the proverbial blue skies in my head for the last few days. Should I stay in New Orleans and work, or move to an island, write poetry and sell coconuts to tourists? Steely Dan’s Gaucho and Airdrawndagger by Sasha happily echoed my tropical reverie. The tangibility of real life made itself felt, however. Today is frustrating – my ducks refuse to get in a row at work (cooperate with me, people!!!) and, to top it all, one of my best friends informed me that he lost his mother over the weekend. In possession of only a few choice selections of music at work, picked with California Dreaming in mind, I am now stuck with Maitri’s Music For A Summer Vacation when I desparately want to turn my death rock amp up to 11. Willie Nelson? No, not quite. Mozart Violin Concertos? Wagner maybe, but not Mozart. Sarah McLachlan? Jeff Buckley? David Byrne? Hell, no. It seems these CDs want me to start bawling uncontrollably. Where are my STP and Alice In Chains albums when I need them? How am I going to accentuate my bad mood without an apt refrain playing in the background? My cloudless sky cannot turn black with ominous clouds in utter silence; I want to hear cymbals clashing, bass drums thumping, electric guitars screeching and the lead singer belting out the lyrics like it’s armageddon.

Oooh, what’s this? The Very Best of Elvis Costello & the Attractions. What’s So Funny ‘Bout Peace, Love and UnderstandingI Can’t Stand Up for Falling DownHigh FidelityPump It Up - Brilliant Mistake. Yup, this will do just fine. Not Ride Of A Valkyrie music, but fine for jumping up and down before attacking one of my problems.

I maintain that melody is a good muse and stays true to your emotional needs. Now to find a way to transport my entire record collection with me everywhere I go.

California Tipping In The Ocean

Verily there is nothing like the sea. Bodysurfing off the coast of Ventura on Wednesday evening, the ocean carrying me from surf to shore, was truly a treat to my eyes, body and soul. The Pacific and her magnificence will never cease to amaze me, whether I encounter her in Oregon, San Diego or Baja California. Absolutely mesmerized by her awesome vastness, I am now convinced that there is a spiritual connection between that ocean and me. When I walk on her shores and look out on her endlessness … oh, mother. Being a Pisces, I must have been a mermaid in a previous existence. Fish to water, or something to that effect. Of course, the allergies are back upon landing in New Orleans. C’est la vie, c’est bon.

Coastal California. Whenever those words are uttered, my eyes wander into the distance and I can only think of Thomas Dolby’s Screen Kiss:

Miller time at the bar where all the English meet
She used to drink in the hills,
only now she drinks in the valley.
Where every road has a name like Beachwood Avenue or so it seems,
a Croydon girl could really hope to find a home.
With a thousand miles of real estate to choose from,
you begin to see the value of your freedom.

The moon is bright in the haze above old Hollywood
and deer look down from the hills
And it’s three o’clock in the morning
Pill in hand you can hear his golden surfer voice
crying out, mummy won’t come out of the bathroom
And you’d hoped he’d say he’s sorry if he hit you
but he’s buried in the screenplay of his feature

Screen kiss, one screen kiss
Straight from a film I forget who was in
Screen kiss, one screen kiss
Blue filter lens, a pool of vaseline

But all the rushes look the same
Only there’s a movie I wouldn’t pay to see again
if it’s the one with him in

You and I could be a mile above the earth tremors
Hold to me and we’ll climb
You could sneak out while he’s sleeping
Suicide in the hills above old Hollywood
is never gonna change the world.
Change the world overnight
Any more than the invention of the six-gun, child
Any more than the discovery of Radium,
or California tipping in the ocean

Screen kiss, one screen kiss …

Dr. Science Gets Yeasty

Dear Doctor Science,
When you make bread, does yeast feel pain?
– Diane H. from Ann Arbor, Michigan

“Definitely. In fact, the tiny bubbles in bread are yeast screams, released as you cut the bread. You can’t hear them because they’re at too high a frequency. But your pets can. This is why so many dogs seem to be begging at the dinner table. They aren’t asking for food; they’re trying to save a yeast’s life. Pillsbury lab experiments have yielded the largest and strangest of yeast species – code named Poppin’ Fresh – that will emit a scream when poked in the tummy with a forefinger. Yes, it’s all part of a program to convince us that yeast enjoys getting baked alive.

Gold Star Question
If a Buddhist might really be a fly or spider in another life, is it OK to swat him with my newspaper?
— Andrew Denny from Norwich

Hindi Fun Diamonds

Just in case you were interested why I was missing around the end of July and the beginning of August, I was in central Ohio (not necessarily the sticks) to attend and participate in the wedding of my cousin, the wine expert extraordinaire, Ms. DVR. When a colleague at work asked why I needed to take a week off for this wedding, I explained, “If you thought My Big Fat Greek Wedding was a trip, you should attend an Indian wedding, which is really a large family reunion posing as the ceremony dedicated to uniting two people in holy matrimony.” We have a dance party on the night before the wedding, a party to prepare for that party, and yet another party prior to that to get in the swing of things. The Olympics opening ceremonies pale in comparison to this wave that builds momentum, grows into high tide, and recedes just as quickly as it came. (Not minus at least two post-parties, of course.)

Without going into too many personal details, the week was splendid. A perfect opportunity for me to let my mother dote on her only daughter, I was dressed in glam, glitz, and other fine Indian riches and felt like royalty, not often experienced by a geologist who excels at wearing sensible clothing while looking at rocks and computers. Nicely enough, such dichotomy is what makes life interesting to me, and I lapped it all up. I haven’t worn such heavy and beautiful clothing, and eaten equally heavy and beautiful food in a long while. My cousin and her parents outdid themselves in the preparation department, with especially high marks for color coordination and timing. Reportedly, I was great as the narrator for said wedding, enlightening Hindus and non-Hindus alike on the large amount of symbolism behind the Vedic wedding tradition.

My have-to-sit-down-for-this moment: The extended family loves D. I was quite flummoxed by this unexpected turn of events, as I thought most of the stick-in-the-mud, old-world, opinionated Indian panjandrums would simply ignore the big white boy in the corner. However, D had a lot of fun meeting everyone and endeared himself to all of the family members he met (especially the key players, my grandma and nieces).

A special note about dancing at Indian events: it happens and it happens a lot. I am usually the dancing fiend at all functions that involve a dance floor and a bass beat, so various members of my family dropped their jaws to the ground in horror/amazement as my brother jammed with his wife and jumped up and down with me during every one of the pop/rock/hip-hop numbers. Why I never have my camcorder on me at the most opportune moments is beyond me. My mom danced for just one number because she was coerced into it by her friend. I saw her sneak off to the dessert table towards the end of the song when she thought no one was looking. (You want to hear something really funny? My mother and the daughter of my grandpa’s then best friend started Indian classical dance lessons on the same day when they were approximately 5 years old. Mother quit a week later and grew up to be, well, my intellectual and beautiful yet “she ain’t got no rhythm” mom while the other girl, Padma Subramaniam, is now the most celebrated and decorated classical dance artiste of India. That cracks me up every time I think about it.) Unexpected or not, the spirit of enjoyment permeated everything and everyone. As we watched my uncle break it down on the dance floor with my cousin’s new father-in-law, we beamed and felt good that, for once, my uncle just decided to cut loose and party. At that moment, I truly loved my family. It was worth the whole week of travel, frenzied preparation, lack of sleep and energy expenditure.

Sitting in my New Orleans office, as I listen to The Best of The Smiths and work on seismic data at my workstation, should be comforting, but it really isn’t. For I am on the go again – off to California for a week-long field trip that begins on Monday the 16th. “Itinerant” doesn’t even begin to cover my current state. When do I get to sit down again? May you live in interesting times, the wise man once said.

Finn For All

8 times! 8 times I’ve tried to catch Neil Finn live in concert and finally succeeded. Neil Finn has got to have one of the most amazing lyrical voices in the music industry. Guy’s almost 50 but still retains his boyish voice and charm. That was a great show, some old standards, some new! And I got to stand a mere 5 feet away from Neil … swoooon!

A nice, small environment at the House of Blues, close to the action, great songs, and a very respectful crowd, as KJW said. They started with songs from Finn, their first brother-act album and then went into a few from Woodface and the later Enz albums, all sprinkled with material from their latest album, which I pre-ordered and will be out August 28. Not a whisper from Temple of Low Men – boo. Through it all, Tim either played keyboards or flailed about with a tambourine like a flamingo with balance issues – that was funny. They closed with Four Seasons in One Day, which made me feel very melancholy for a while after.

Did I tell you I got to stand 5 feet away from Neil for one song, before the speakers got too loud for my old ears?! He’s not very tall, though, and his hair gives him the added height.

LAB replies to my review: “He is only 45! Isn’t his voice beautiful? It’s too bad you couldn’t have seen him solo, or with Crowded House. He rocked out a lot more then. Hopefully he will release another solo album sometime soon, and then we will get another solo tour! I would have loved to hear Four Seasons, such a beautiful song. The song list will be posted on the frenz of the enz site.

“Do you have 7 Worlds Collide, the live CD? It’s really good. Johnny Marr is all over it and what’s his bucket from the Smiths sings “There is a light that never goes out,” which I always thought was the funniest song. That’s my weird sense of humor for you! (Morrisey … blanked out for a minute). “

I have to liven up my Enz/Crowdies/NeilFinn CD collection. Lessee:

Best Crowded House: Temple of Low Men, Woodface, and Together Alone. Their first (Crowded House) is just OK

Best Neil: The new (er) Neil Finn – One All, is again just OK. I love Try Whistling This. One All has too much basement stuff (see below).

Best Enz: Coroboree or True Colors-the Greatest Hits CD

Best Finn Brothers: None? Don’t really like ‘em. Sounds too much like they were written and recorded in the family basement. (Probably true.) But I have them anyway.

One Nil: So-so. It’s called One All in the the States because (I guess) Americans are idiots and don’t understand what “Nil” means. There are some good songs on it, but nothing as good as Sinner or King Tide from the first solo CD. It’s much more mellow.

You should get Together Alone, the last Crowded House CD. Nails in My Feet is a great song that didn’t make it on Recurring Dreams.

Here’s an interesting website I came across with CH record reviews. This guy certainly has a love/hate relationship with CH. Note especially the Lord of the Rings paragraph.