Which I used on the large prickly weeds last evening because I was so sick of having to dig the replicating f**kers out every single day and almost hosed my foot down with the stuff and worried that my kids will be born with their livers outside their bodies and …

Anyway, on with the links.

Earth Magazine | Geologists to be charged for not predicting earthquake? Italy, slow on the science uptake since the early 17th century.

BP To Create $20 Billion Fund For Claims On Day 59 of the still-gushing oil volcano, how can this, a partial repayment by a private company to the United States for the horrible damage wreaked on the Gulf Coast’s waters, land, people, jobs and pysche, in any way be referred to as a “bailout” or “redistribution of wealth?” How in the world is Rep. Joe Barton (R-TX) “ashamed” of granting the money to victims? I thought one of the most basic tenets of capitalism is You Break It, You Bought It. As Stinque says, “Anyone responsible, civilly or criminally, should be bankrupted and banished from polite society.”

“The Douche Doesn’t Fall Far From The Bag” The starred comments on this Gawker post about Griffith Rutherford Harsh V, son of Meg Whitman and Exhibit A for supporters of the estate tax, are comedy gold.

Heehaw Marketing | The Cultural Tour Bus “Even with a Budweiser sized budget, it’s just not possible to immerse a team in someone else’s world enough. A single insight doesn’t really give us much understanding at all. And really, with the surface level nonsense most are doing, we’re usually just pecking at observational scraps rather than reaching for some perceptive nirvana.” The article references an interview with David Simon about the Average Reader.

McSweeney | I’m Comic Sans, A**hole “We don’t all have seventy-three weights of stick-up-my-ass Helvetica sitting on our seventeen-inch MacBook Pros. Sorry the entire world can’t all be done in stark Eurotrash Swiss type. Sorry some people like to have fun.”

[From Boing Boing]

Alternative titles for this post:

1. Why It’s The Aristocats and Jungle Book And No More
2. When Preying On Kids’ Separation Anxiety Isn’t Enough
3. Mainstreaming Grimm’s Medieval Germany In Modern America
4. Hey, Eeyore Is A Princess, Too

The latest release from the murky head of Michael Homan (not to be confused with Tête d’Adrastos): GEAUXJIRA!

Director’s note: “As we made our movie, thousands of barrels of oil leaked every day on the Gulf of Mexico’s floor, causing the biggest environmental disaster in our lifetime. Moreover, we’re terrified about the ramifications the oil will have on our economy and lives. In making a parody there is a danger of giving the impression that we find this calamity to be funny. In fact, the opposite is true. We’re angry and frightened about the uncertain impact of this disaster.”

It’s an instant classic: god bless the Jurassic age of 2 million years ago, the Who Dat Boom, Pirate Persephone and the firing of the Crystal Cannons. Beyond priceless, indeed.

Just don’t. They carry coconuts around.

Coolest video I’ve seen in ages (annoying narrator is annoying, so audio is unnecessary).

Octopus is made of PURE WIN. This is seafloor footage we need more of.

The creators of HomicideThe Corner, and The Wire are at it again, this time in a city not wholly unfamiliar to readers of this blog: New Orleans.  Treme premieres on HBO this Sunday at 10PM Eastern. David Simon fans everywhere are working themselves into a tizzy, but keep in mind this isn’t The Wire: New Orleans edition. Simon and co-producer Eric Overmyer explain:

Unlike The Wire, Treme is not about drugs or rampant corruption among city officials. Instead, the series follows ordinary New Orleans citizens as they attempt to rebuild their lives following Hurricane Katrina … the decision to leave the grittiness behind in Baltimore was a conscious choice.

Is the show too much too late?

Almost five years have passed since Katrina and the Flood, we’ve proven in the last year that our government and economy are broken and Americans don’t give two shits about one another and, especially with the Superbowl win and Mayor Ray Nagin out the door, it seems that New Orleanians want to move past living in post-K PTSD. Kinda odd timing to bring back Late 2005 and to apply again the floodlines that had just faded away from walls and hearts, isn’t it?

Here’s the dirty secret: No one learned a damned thing from what happened. Up here in Ohio, I am sometimes asked, “Well, what did you expect would happen when a Category 5 hurricane hit a city 20 feet below sea level?” (To which all I want to do is torch my computer and blog and walk into the forest, away from the willfully, yet-underinformed troglodytes.) Down in New Orleans, many are not back in their homes FIVE YEARS LATER exactly because of rampant government corruption, the state government goes through great lengths to reduce much-needed physical and mental health and educational services and a second failure of the federally-built levees is still a very distinct possibility. Comprehensive flood protection a la the Dutch is only a dream. Outside, it’s America. Back in May of 2007, at a horrifyingly low point in the city’s recovery, my buddy Dambala presciently observed: “It’s not just New Orleans that is dying … I think it’s America in general. We are just the cynosure of the descent … the most photogenic example.” Enter the recession and the latest Grand Circus Of Democracy.

It’s not too much and never too late.

But, here’s the real secret: New Orleans is more than a warning, a cautionary tale. It just is, with a tale that can be told 50 or 500 years from now. The matter of how much and when thus becomes irrelevant. All the citizens of New Orleans have ever wanted since August 29th, 2005 is reoccupy their homes, their neighborhoods, their lives and to let the world know that what happened in New Orleans was not the result of a hurricane but flooding caused by the breakdown of levee protection and federal, state and local government. They don’t want your respect or sympathy on account of being mostly black citizens of an irreplaceable city chock full of historic architecture, rich food, tasty drinks and grand merriment. They want your acknowledgment that they, too, are people who have a certain way of going about their lives and that’s that. Treme tells us this story.

So, I will watch the show out of curiosity and expatriate pride … and cojones, an anxious feeling in the pit of my stomach and hope that they get it mostly right.

And blog about it. In anticipation of the show, I founded the Back Of Town blog and invited writer friends from the NOLA Bloggers/First Draft/New Package krewe to hold forth on the show there. And, gods love the internet, have they already brought it pre-premiere: Go check out the news and opinion posts and, starting Sunday, episode reviews. And please feel free to join the conversation or just bring the popcorn and enjoy the discussion and dissection. But come:

America needs to understand New Orleans, whether it wants to or not, whether it believes it needs to or not.  Whether Treme will help make that happen is anyone’s guess, but even without having seen it, I don’t think this story of New Orleans, of its value, is to be told as a request, with an open hand, with an aspiration, or a goal, other than that of verity.  It’s a story to stand on its own merits, for its own sake. It has value because it is. Some know that, others seeking to know will come to bear their own witness.

Lizzy Caston and I were to write a mode d’emploi for air travel in this day and age of the ever-orange threat advisory.  A sample: Lady, please do your best not to wear four-inch-heeled slouch boots and every metal ring and bracelet in your collection before entering airport security.  The grimace on your face as you hobble about like a startled flamingo while trying to yank that thing of your foot amuses no one and only makes us standing in line behind you at 6AM want to push you down and carry on. Ok, it wasn’t going to be snide and actually more polite and helpful, honest.  Given recent explosive and “explosive” events and evolving TSA guidelines, however, Lizzy and I are going to have to sit on a few more flights, visiting a few more airports in the process, before we can pen anything useful.

Lists it is, then.  Best of decade (never mind that the new decade technically does not start until January 1, 2011) and best of year lists.  Ranking things is not my cup of tea; all of my top five movies rate about the same.  But what motivates others’ sort algorithms and makes their #1? Let’s see.  As always, please add to the discussion and feel free to list your favorite lists in the Comments section.

Naughts Collage

TECHNOLOGY – Since my Precious iPhone has not been more than arm’s length away at any given moment this year, to the point that my husband thinks I need to “tweetox,” it seems only fitting to start with Wired’s 20 Favorite iPhone Apps of 2009.  Productivity is king, followed by games, travel and hobbies.  Am I supposed to be embarrassed that I’ve downloaded only 2 of the 20 – Runkeeper and RedLaser – or proud to have gone this long without spending money on some of these not-free apps? $5 for Instapaper when I can simply Safari over to reader.google.com?!  I think not.  What are some of your favorite apps and why?

MORE TECHNOLOGY – The Real-Time Web is all that excites me in this list of 2009′s disruptive technology. Augmented Reality has potential but, in my opinion, isn’t ubiquitous enough to have made a difference yet.  Google Voice and Wave haven’t shown me their value this year, either.  What do you think? PC World’s list of the 10 disruptors of the last quarter century rings truer even today – I highly recommend this read.

MOVIES and technology – Roger Ebert is a rockstar.  Here’s a man who can find a great movie in a stinking haystack, commit to his picks and explain patiently to you why.  Ebert’s on Twitter, where he points us to all four of his Best Films of 2009 lists.

Aside from watching the Lord of the Rings trilogy, Matrix trilogy, Harry Potter saga and a handful of pop and arthouse films in the theatre this decade, I have to admit that D and I are not the best cinema-goers, preferring to watch DVDs in the comfort of our home (Netflix – now there’s a decadal gamechanger mentioned little), and even that has fallen by the wayside.  But along comes streaming video, the Creative Commons (also one of the best concepts given form in the 2000s) and the notion of simply putting your art out there, the studios be damned, and you get beautiful genius like Nina Paley’s Sita Sings The Blues, which has been around a lot longer than you think.  Whether a movie has live actors or animated ones, the most important thing about it is the story.  To paraphrase my dear, departed 3D Arts professor, George Cramer, all the visual effects dreamt of in Hollywood cannot polish a turd of a story.  This is why I am not likely to watch Avatar and recommend Monsters, Inc. instead.  Excellent story + well-animated fur = WIN.

MUSIC and technologyNPR’s The Decade’s 50 Most Important Recordings Between YouTube and downloadable MP3s, my music collection grew and grew up in leaps and bounds this decade.  Ignoring the current obsession with emo-hipster bands, pop divas and American Idol ingenues, there was some real good stuff: Radiohead’s Kid A and self-released In Rainbows, Kanye West’s College Dropout, Madeleine Peyroux’s Careless Love, The Flaming Lips’ Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots, The New Orleans Bingo! Show’s For A Life Ever Bright, Neko Case’s Fox Confessor Brings The Flood, Sasha’s Airdrawndagger, DJ Krush’s Jaku and OutKast’s Stankonia.  Coolest music videos of the decade: Ok Go’s On Treadmills, Clint Maedgen’s It’s A Complicated Life and Empire Of The Sun’s We Are The People.  Alright, folks, tell me what I missed and why.

BOOKS and technology – Forget the Kindle and nook.  And forget those who tell you this carefully-planned obsolescence is going to change the nature of reading.  Find a light laptop and/or smartphone you’re comfortable with, do actual work with it and download books to it.  A book is not an exotic bird to be placed in the gilded cage of DRM, but something to be owned, shared and, most importantly, read many times on any platform.  I’m against the iTunes model of book consumption – fit the media to the unique delivery mechanism – and publishing companies’ constant war on the public domain.  Hooray for copyfight and folks like Cory Doctorow who have the balls to self-publish quality literature.  True defenders of freedom will enjoy and be inspired by his Little Brother.

The Times Online’s 100 Best Books of the Decade. If you’re going to read only one of them, make it Junot Diaz’s The Brief, Wondrous Life Of Oscar Wao.  What a book.  A Dungeons&Dragons-playing Dominican-American college student, the gut-punching dialogue and relationships, the history, the profanity oh the succulent profanity, the future.  What a book.  Your best read?

SPORTS – An NFL junkie, my most important moment in sports was the New Orleans Saints’ 2006 return to the Superdome after the Flood and Tom Benson’s near treachery.  Granted, it contained no triumph of athleticism, but you’d think it rates (sorry, brimmy, but the Patriots-Brady-NFL-ESPN lovefest is getting old).  Again, is there another such moment in the 00s that I should be aware of?  Please comment away.  Lastly, for the record, I am very pleased with my quarterback and Athenae‘s imaginary boyfriend, Aaron Rodgers.  His stats this season show that the team made the right decision and everyone else should shut it.

TELEVISION – When Babylon 5 ended in 1998, I despaired.  This is why God invented Deadwood, Battlestar Galactica, The Wire, Rescue Me and Futurama.  After Lando Calrissian and Kosh, the outstretched arms and biting sarcasm of Bender and Tommy Gavin beckoned. After Katrina and the Flood, the confused innards of Al Swearengen’s Deadwood, Adama and Starbuck made all too much sense.  The Onion AV Club’s Best TV Series Of The 00′s nails it.

LIST TO IGNORETen Stories that Changed Our Lives This Decade: #10 Katrina. #9 Brett Favre.  Delete.  Any list that places Favre, whose family was very much affected by the hurricane, over the suffering of people goes right out the window.

THE WEIRD AND CHEESEHEADY, ‘cuz that’s how we roll2009 in Review: Top Weird Stories From Wisconsin: “A 37-year-old Fond du Lac man went to a motel room for what he thought was going to be a romantic tryst but instead was assaulted by four women who used Krazy Glue to attach his privates to his stomach. Police say it was all part of a bizarre plot to punish him for a lover’s quadrangle gone bad.”  Hey, we gave you Ed Gein and Jeffrey Dahmer. Enough said.

ROUNDUP – I’m a sucker for New York Times graphics.  Philip Niemeyer pictures the past 10 years in a neat little 12×10 matrix.  The word “truthiness” gained popularity around the same time as Katrina/Federal Flood (they used a flood graphic and not a counterclockwise spinny one, phew).  2008′s maverick was Ron Paul and not John McCain – can’t keep pulling out the same old shtick every four years.  I often wonder what happened to 2008′s ardent house flippers.  Hmmm, Brownie was a Bushie term of endearment in 2004 but “tsunami” wasn’t big until 2006?  I really like the evolution of key nouns and verbs across the decade.  Would you have done this graphic differently?

Thus, 2009 comes to an end.  The ox gives way to the tiger.  Here’s wishing all of you a safe rest of the year and a great 2010 filled with pleasant surprises and many new buzzwords to learn.  Peace.